Let's Figure This Out.
Three weeks ago, this felt doable. Like we were pulling up our bootstraps, and we were headed together to take on this whole thing. Truthfully, I romanticized this a bit. What closet could I clean out? How could we spend more time as a family? Those ideas have swiftly faded to thoughts on survival in ways that keep us all mentally, emotionally, and physically healthy.
Yesterday afternoon after I got off a conference call, I surveyed the damage. The living room was a MESS; we still hadn’t done the breakfast dishes, nor had we finished school. There was a massive pile of unfolded laundry in the dining room. Like my neighbors could totally see it from the street if they walked by my house and looked in the window. Bodey was crying, Chase was bouncing a basketball, and for the 100th time, I told him not to as Erik was in my office downstairs right below, probably feeling the reverberation of each bounce and Blake was back on Fortnite, again. My phone had just pinged with a text that school was now canceled for the rest of the year.
Okay..deep breath. Deep breath.
I’m trying to figure out how to keep the non-profit I started afloat through all of this. Five plus years of hard and meaningful work. I refuse to let the virus take it down. I receive 10 emails a day about growing your business amidst COVID-19, or self-care, or a webinar that is sure to offer some golden ticket insight that no one has been privy to before. Let’s be honest, no one really knows exactly what to do. Add to this mounting stories of people impacted by this virus in all ways. The cherry on top is the increasing politicization of all of this, on both sides. The country divide is real and palpable.
Yesterday felt like a new low. Yes, I have one million things to be thankful for. My family is healthy, we have jobs, and we have a safe home to shelter in. But I’m also very intuitive, and I sense this overall heaviness around me. So after I had a good pity party and shed some tears, here is where I’m at today. No, I’m not pedaling some pie in sky idea about personal growth, but I’m asking us all to huddle up and regroup.
Here are some things I’m thinking about/questions I’m asking myself. I’ll be back next week with my (in the current moment) answers. Maybe they will be helpful for you to think about too:
When Ethan was sick, we were in the hospital for 13 months. While I felt very disconnected physically from some people I love, I was also surrounded by so many other people who loved us and became our family. We need people. How can I better connect with the people I love?
What do I need to lead my family through this? Mentally, emotionally, physically?
What do my kids need? I plan to break the news about school and ask them this weekend. I do think that kids might be doing better than parents. This article resonated with me.
How can I organize my family in a way that works for us? Even if I have to push back on some school plans and expectations. Can I create a better schedule and set expectations and structure for my kids?
How can I be kinder to myself during this time?
What can I shed and tighten up in my business? Think simplify.
How can I be kinder to my family? Let’s be honest, we’re all under one roof at the same time, day and night :-)
I do think this time is inviting us to be extremely present to ourselves and our families. Being present is sometimes really hard and draining. Especially if we have little kids or children with special needs (my hand is raised here) or complicated relationships in our house. But I believe we can do this within the confines of structure and boundaries. What does that look like?
I don’t have all the answers, but I do want to work through this, and I hope you will join me. The time will pass. It will eventually be August or September. The question is, what will we do with this time? Sending each of you a big hug and a fist pump. We’ve got this. We CAN grow through this. I hope you find some JOY in tiny moments this weekend.
I launched a new special project called Heart Strong for Healthcare this week. The Ethan Lindberg Foundation sent 1,000 HEART STRONG Shirts to healthcare workers in NYC, Boston, Chicago and San Francisco to encourage them to be Heart Strong. You can read more about this project here.
